Help a Sister Out

Dear Universe,

First of all, I agree with Pen and Ruby. The clamshells, they are problematic, and we need to work on that. In turn, I will agree to not buy so much expensive dark, delicious chocolate. Also, let's really try to hold off on the aches and pains of aging. I know I ran a little longer on the treadmill the other day than normal, but really, 3 days of back/neck cricks is a little MUCH.

Other than this, you're doing ok these days. You have improved 2009 A LOT since the first half, so kudos for that.

Now that I've gotten the gratitude out of the way, I'd like to talk about the crazy. Yes. The Crazy.

You know, the Crazy that comes approximately once a month? Yeah. That one. I quit taking birth control because it exacerbated the Crazy, made it stick around the entire month. And I guess I can see how you think only a few days/one week is a pretty good trade off, but really, it is SO NOT.

My co-workers, friends, semi-significant other don't always know hormones are responsible, and I simply cannot afford to be an irrational, neurotic bitch 5 days a month (60 days a year) on the job/at home/at the bar. I will get fired. I will get dumped. I will lose drinking buddies and become a lonesome alcoholic.

You don't want that, do you?

No. I didn't think so.

So please, for the love of me, tone down the Crazy. I can't take it anymore, and wine is only an acceptable medicine part of the time.

LYLAS,

Niki