shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Showing posts with label Spirits. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Spirits. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

In it to win it

vintage gymnast

I always thought I’d like to be a gymnast, if I could “play” professionally. The sport is just so damn beautiful, and I cannot tear my eyes away come the Summer Olympics. I mean, obviously it would be quite a commitment of time, money, and other resources. Lots of travel and leotards. The loss of my youth. I fully imagine my teacher would be inspiring but mean, like Bela K, and my self-esteem would suffer, as well as my ability to have a monthly period.

But, the payoff would be GOLD.

There is the *small* hurdle of my tripping over my own two feet while walking, and the fact that I never could learn how to do a cartwheel. Details, schmetails… and another life required.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Fight Nice, Ladies

Oh hell, y'all.

Perhaps I am the only one who realizes the implications of the BCS Championship game, so I will refresh your my-team-didn't-make-it-so-I-quit-watching memories:

One very fetching barmaid who knows her football, Niki, is a Gator chompin' Florida fan.

One oh-so lovely and highly hilarious reader, Bj, is a Boomer Sooner Oklahoma fan.

Can Niki appreciate the Stoops visor, which is a direct descendant of her (one-time long ago) boy, Spurrier? Or will this get as ugly as I'm afraid it might? Fight nice, ladies, fight nice.

(PS: Not that I'm trying to start any shit, but... Nik, Bj said all she wanted for Christmas was some gator skin boots. I'm just sayin'...)

Friday, October 31, 2008

A Definite Chill in the Otherwise Warm Springtime Air

gallows When M came to visit Pen in the spring of 2003, she insisted on doing all sorts of crazy “tourist” things to see and learn about this historic little North Carolina town, like taking the trolley tour while Pen went to work, and then dragging Pen along to this wacky museum that is solely devoted to snakes. But this story, alas, is not about the Serpentarium. One evening, they meandered downtown to take part in the local Ghost Walk, the very idea of which creeped Pen out. While waiting down by the river, they gazed into a tattoo and piercings shop, Pen briefly pondering the acquisition of an eyebrow ring. Luckily for her mother, it did not happen. Also, they happened to see Dawson (of the Creek), who was filming that evening and accosted by several young teeny-bopper types for autographs. I wondered, Couldn’t we do the Wilmywood Tour instead? No, no we could not.

Our tour guide eventually arrived, a middle-aged woman wearing black and gray, hair pulled back into a tight bun, and carrying a lantern. The group that night was a small one, and together we traipsed from haunted place to haunted place, all within a five-block or so radius, and all entirely too close to my apartment at the time. This place is just haunted, y’all.

We stopped by a haunted bar, a waterfront restaurant, an alleyway next to another bar, learning from our most excellent guide of all the spirits within, and then moved on to a few downtown houses. Things began to get especially creepy standing in front of a house where a ghost was known to be spotted in one of the darkened, third-floor windows. Did anyone see movement? Did anyone not? We couldn’t be entirely sure. In another house, the ghost of a woman who died in childbirth haunted the house to look after her own baby, and now allegedly looks after the children of others. Then, a graveyard, haunted by the ghost of a man buried alive. We were so close to my apartment by then, couldn’t we have just broken off from the group and ran home like bats out of hell? No, no we could not.

We then arrived at Gallows Hill. An empty lot next to a big house that had been converted into an office building for an architect’s firm. Why was it called Gallows Hill? Because back in the day, lots and lots of people were hanged there. And lots of people, without family or friends living in the area, were buried on site. Some of these people apparently had unfinished business. None of the ghosts in the house have been documented as mean, per se, but they are definitely present. Mirrors frost over on hot summer days, and a window upstairs is often spotted with the word “HELP” written in the same sort of ice on the glass. Certain smells with seemingly no source have been noted in the house: pipe tobacco and baking bread. Furniture moves from one spot to the other. A girl staying in the house once upon a time felt a ghost’s fingers running through her hair. In response to the site and the tour guide’s story, Ghost Tour walkers have been known to experience chills, a strong feeling of unease, or even sickness. Babies have cried, women have vomited into the azalea bushes upon stepping onto the property.

As for M and I, we were of course sufficiently creeped out by the stories, and me particularly creeped out thinking the my apartment was no less than two blocks from these premises. Then M remembered her earlier trolley tour, which passed by the site, and the hair on the back of her neck had stood up—just before the trolley tour guide had announced they were on “Hangman’s Hill.” There was something about this place, for sure. We were cold, and there was the prevailing sense as our tour guide continued to speak that we just needed to leave. Which of course we did not.

Well eventually, yes, we moved on again with the tour, which ended shortly thereafter, and made our way back home, thoroughly spooked by our surroundings, which we now knew all too much about. Clearly, being five years ago, I need to take this tour again and offer a follow-up report. Do you dare me?

Happy Halloween!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Spiritual presence

I'm not sure if this is the type of story Niki was looking for when she assigned this week's Special, but it's what immediately came to mind and I haven't been able to come up with anything else. I'm not sure how well I will be able to retell it; it's such a sensory experience...but, enough with the excuses. . .

When I was in the 8th grade, my grandmother moved into the house next door to us (it was actually fellow bar maid, Ashley's grandmother's house prior to my grandmother occupying it, ironically enough). I was going through the moody teenage years and tired of my family, so I would stay at her house most nights. One night, I come over and the TV sounded oddly -alarmingly - loud, even for her. I normally would call out to announce my presence, but I didn't for some reason. I walked through the house, quietly taking things in and feeling a weird sense of alarm or just knowledge in the air that something was amiss. I found my grandmother on the floor in the kitchen. She had died of a heart attack. While making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (that always gets me for some reason - that the loaf of bread and PB were still open, the knife on the floor). After running to her side (in a strange slow motion, fast pan away like in a movie, I was suddenly watching from outside the kitchen window, not actively participating) and making the call to my parents, not knowing exactly what to say, hearing my mother's desperate cry to my father, just his name, but there was so much emotion, like she was pleading, that he'd somehow be able to come over and fix what I had just told her, we were sitting on the couch, crying and suddenly, in between my parents, the tears stopped for me and I felt this rush of warmth and peace. I can't really explain it any better, but I knew it was my grandmother saying goodbye and telling me it would be ok. That I would be ok. It was only an instant and like nothing I've ever experienced before, but it's still a source of comfort to think back on. I know this post is a little. . .revealing, but it really is about a positive experience for me. A powerful encounter and something I really believe in.

Monday, June 30, 2008

Sad day in Dawg nation

When Hubby informed me that Uga VI had passed away last week I was shocked that this bit of news hadn't made it to Smartini yet, with a good half of the barmaids being avid Dawg fans. So, I'm doing my part to include it now.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Hangover

I hate to even promote this picture because someone was killed, but it's just too wild not to submit on WTFriday!

And I couldn't bring myself to title it with anything about Shaken, not stirred, or Well Blended either.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

While You Were at the Bar 6/5

News you can use:

Kids, the day we have all been waiting for for the past four months will be here soon. Hil will suspend her campaign for the Democratic nomination on Saturday, when she will endorse Barack Obama. Whatever you have to say about Hil, you have got to give the woman credit for not backing down. Even if I still don't necessarily like her and her awful pantsuits and scarves (how I hate those scarves), I've got to give her the Bulldog award for keeping the fight in the dog.

The Detroit Red Wings won the Stanley Cup Wednesday night. They beat the Pittsburgh Penguins 3-2. I'm not a big hockey fan but it's always good to be up on current events, right? Or at the very least I should mention it should some cranky hockey player come and bust my lights out for the travesty of skimming over something as big as the Stanley Cup.

U.S. naval ships that have been in the waters outside Myanmar have left after being denied access to donate relief supplies. U.S. naval boats and personnel have been waiting since May 13th for the ruling junta to let them in and deliver relief supplies, but to no avail. I DO NOT understand.

News you can lose:

The local historians in Wellfleet, Mass. thought their lighthouse had been taken down and destroyed in 1925. Oh no, says Colleen MacNeney. The lighthouse was taken down and moved to California, where it still serves its purpose as a navigational aid and as a hostel. Pretty cool stuff for the lighthouse inclined peeps in Mass., but who knew there was a magazine called Lighthouse Digest and a group called the American Lighthouse Foundation? To each his own, to each his own.

Word of the Day:

germane: appropriate or fitting; relevant

It would have been more germane to have 'tree hugger' as the WOD but something tells me I might get a large load of well tended soil delivered on top of my car by a certain superhero.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Football & the Feds

This must really be a WTFriday because as I general rule, I do not blog at work. HOWEVER, in my morning news reads, I discovered a very noteworthy news item that I feel it is my duty to share with my fellow Smartinis and readers. I don't want the criminal acts of collegiate football to fly under the radar with all the other important issues our government has to address - like war and poverty and education and stuff. The real question is...is the Bowl Championship Series illegally restraining trade??? Apparently some cuckoo legislators think so.

Ladies, behold: our tax dollars not at work.

Lawmakers: Sack the BCS
Congressmen want antitrust probe