shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

The Alpha & The Omega

The Alpha male. The pack leader. Ladies man. Machoest of macho guys. Must be in control of everyone and every situation.

I'm gonna get down to it: Are alpha men better in bed than non-alphas*?


I say no. Non-alphas, in my experience in general, tend to be more attentive and "longer lasting." Alphas, I guess, just haven't felt the need to hone those particular skills, in general, because women are constantly falling at their feet. There are exceptions on both sides of this rule, but in general it holds pretty true. (I have this unsettling feeling this post is going to get me in a lot of trouble one day.)

*I use the term non-alphas deliberately because not all non-alphas are nerds, but nerds/alphas is the popular dichotomy.  Non-alphas can be athletic, guys-guys but still not the alpha, as in the charismatic leader.  Lots of guys proclaim to be alphas because they don't want to be "nerds," but in reality alphas are few and far between - think of the wolf pack - all of them are badass, but only "one" true alpha.

9 tips left at the bar:

mendacious said...

totally apropos given the last post! well... definitely the non-alphas bcs hello NOel became completely hot, sometimes its worth the wait. i tend to not like superpopular things just on the stance that i don't want to be one of 5 girls leaving presents on his doorstep. i learned my lesson when i was 21, nonetosoon, truestory. i either want to be ahead of trends or way behind them, and instead i just make the alphas my 'friend' and secretly unrequiettedly like them. and its interesting too because guys them selves are very aware of this deliniation and i have overheard a few just recently talking about- oh god, that guy is such a jerk, he gets all 'alpha'- one on one he's fine but then... i found it pretty funny and insightful. that it is an entire attitude and being and they're forever plagued by it. and i myself dont have the patience to witness much of it. all that posturing is exhausting. let alone the comments you have to hear from other girls who are like omg... i'm dying. he's just so HOT. how do i look? do you think he'll notice me today? i left him a handmade card of his favorite artist on his patio as a surprise i really hope he likes it. ;P

penelope said...

I'm going to have to agree that alphas in general don't think they have to work for it. This principle may in fact apply to all facets of their life? I ponder.

Tempe said...

Totally agree - alphas typically don't think they have to work between the sheets.

Trust me, I dated one of these alphas - he might have been one of the best looking guys I've ever dated, but he ... well, sucked.

(Nik, can you guess who I'm talking about?? :))

niki said...

M, I couldn't agree more. Hilarious that guys are aware of it, too, and it seems to be a bad thing.

T, I have *no* idea.

Pen - true dat.

Ruby said...

Hmm... I find this very, very interesting, ladies! It does make a girl wonder!

niki said...

WAIT A MINUTE!! It just dawned on me that George Clooney is an alpha male and I love him. There is no way in hell that man is not good in bed. I refuse to believe that. Exceptions to every rule, Nik, exceptions to every rule.

Karen said...

Ruby, why the non-commital response? ;)

I've never had anyone to compare my husband to, being the good (ahem) Catholic girl that I am. But, if having a orgasm rate of 99.5% is any indication (hey, sometimes I am just not in the mood,) I would venture to guess that sex with a non-alpha is infinitely better!
Wait, is Jason a non-alpha? Ruby, Ruby are you there? :)

Ruby said...


I hope that you're ready for company, dear, because the entire internet will be showing up at your door in approximately 3.2 seconds. Hide your husband!

Using Niki's definition, I would say that J is a non-alpha. Using my own... he's pretty darn close! I may be letting his military career blur my decision (and all of those ladies that fall at his feet!). Perhaps the almost alphas are so very 'take charge' that they want to make sure that everything goes right?

BTW: I laughed out loud at the Good Catholic girl comment. ;)

SarannaDeWylde said...

I would say that it depends on the Alpha. I've had amazing sex with Alphas and I've had times where I would have been better off picking my nose and watching the grass grow. At least that would have accomplished something.

My husband is an Alpha male. He's a magnificently large caveman type who is strong enough to club me over the head and drag me back to the cave, but smart enough to know when it's a good idea.

As an Alpha female, I require a man who will give me my way because he wants to, not because he's afraid of me. Which has been a problem in the past.

I don't think Alpha is just physical, it's a mentality too.

Really, I think the whole sex thing comes down to if he's a selfish bastard or not. All the experience in the world doesn't make up for the fact that a person is just out to get balls deep. Even the non-Alphas can have that mentality.

So if your lover wants to please you and you communicate your needs, it's going to be good.

My Alpha is the best I've ever had. Too bad he's at work right now... Sigh. *g*