While You Were at the Bar 6/2

As fast as a speeding bullet, we're the Smartini Girls!

News you can use:

Hillary Clinton wins in the Puerto Rican Democratic primary. I don't even know what more to say on this, we all know the deal. I am reminded, however, of a joke I heard recently: What do Hillary Clinton and a man with 15 kids have in common? (Ok, it's kind of dirty...) Neither one knows when to *ahem* pull out. Seeing as how I have just lowered the classiness of this fine establishment, I will move on...

French designer Yves Saint Laurent died on Sunday at the age of 71. A longtime friend and former partner, Pierre Berge said that Laurent died following a long illness. Laurent is credited with 'empowering women after Chanel freed them' with his revolutionary pantsuits. (Not Hillary's pantsuits, mind you, but good looking ones.)

Good news for the astronauts aboard the International Space Station! Discovery is headed their way with the billion dollar Japanese Kibo module and parts for the bum toilet. There is some concern about damage to Discovery during take off but, priorities first, that toilet must get fixed! The one bathroom on the space station has gone through three pumps in the past one and a half weeks. You don't even want to think about how you go to the bathroom in space. Trust me.

News you can lose:

A man in New Zealand was found guilty of common assault and offensive behavior when he threw a hedgehog at a 15 year old boy. The hedgehog, which may or may not have been alive at the time, hit the boy in the leg and left a red welt and several puncture marks. The man was ordered to pay a fine, with most of it going to the victim. Does this mean that I can sue my sister for that time she chucked a brush at me? Surely I suffered some sort of distress and red welt.

Word of the Day:

mirth: gladness and gaiety, especially when expressed by laughter

Superheroes like Fun Girl don't have to frequent Smartini. We're all about the mirth.