shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Bare Necessities

I'm not sure how this happened, but all of us bartenders are stranded on a deserted island. Thank the heavens we've been allowed 5 items to take with us, but really, JUST FIVE! That's an impossible choice. In the end, I've decided to carry along:

1. A never-ending supply of PEANUT BUTTER - I cannot live without it. Plus, if I'm on a desert island and not killing the animals for meat, I'm gonna need some protein before I waste away. If by some chance I end up on the same island as Tempe, we're gonna have a chocolate and peanut butter par-tay!



2. TOOTHPASTE - Megan is a genius. I cannot stop thinking about how important fresh breath would be when the rest of me is grimy (also, see #4 below).



3. MATCHES - It might get cold at night. I might want to roast my bananas. I could even light a torch so I don't step on any bite-y critters when it's dark.



4. PROPHYLACTICS/CONTRACEPTION - The other Smartini bartenders may be ok with being preggers and having childrens on the deserted island, but not this one. And if my island looks anything like the Lost island, well, these are going to be in high demand.



5. PONYTAIL HOLDER/HAIR CLIP - I do not go a single day without pulling my hair out of my face at some point. I'd die without a way to keep it up. Die.

4 tips left at the bar:

Anonymous said...

This is such a Niki list. Great thinking!

Ruby said...

I agree, this list screams Niki. Sweet, fabulous whoring around Niki!

Oh, wait, did I make mention of possible Sex on the Beach? Sweet, fabulous, whoring around Megan!

Niki said...

Oh right, like either of you could resist Sawyer or Jack if he ended up on your island!

penelope said...

Those pictures pretty much made my day. :)