I am a lame, cheap (and slightly claustrophobic) bastard.

And therefore, I have not been to many concerts. The other Smartinis are way, way cooler than me. In fact, I'm almost embarrassed... well here I go anyway. Answering the question.



1989, NKOTB. The Carrier Dome, Syracuse, NY. Thinking back on it, I'm still shocked I was allowed to go, not only because of the cost, but also the fact of it being a concert an hour and half away from home? I think it might even have been on a school night. The mind boggles. But, I was absolutely, 100% devoted to Joey-Joe and the rest of the boys. You couldn't see my bedroom wallpaper for a good year in there for all the posters and magazine pull-outs I had taped up everywhere. I remember we screamed so loud, and it was ridiculous, because Joey, Jordan, Jonathan, Donnie, and Danny were so far away I might as well have been watching their Mattel action figures perform on that stage. It was exhilarating, though, the whole experience, particularly after the concert when the limo drove by as we were walking back to my friend's parents' car, and we saw one of their hands. The window was cracked and that hand was casually grasping the trim right above the window. The hand was wearing a big fat ring. And really, it could have belonged to anyone, maybe Danny's cousin's next-door neighbor's Uncle Sal, but what they hell did it matter. We shrieked and ran after the car anyway.



Fast forward through several years of lame, cheap bastard living, rarely getting out the house to go anywhere, much less to a concert, and I began dating J.Lo. J.Lo is quite into music, had racks in his living room crammed with CDs, and so concerts were an obvious, necessary date. We saw Norah Jones at the House of Blues in Myrtle Beach. Man, she's gorgeous. Then Clutch (of all things, I went to see CLUTCH) downtown at Mars. Marz? Marzz, maybe. See, I couldn't even tell you how they spell the venue name, and I've only lived here 7 years and visited said venue twice. Sadly, I couldn't tell you who that second visit was for. Maybe the Scissor Sisters? I think that was it. I think I might have been a little, erm, blitzed during the Scissor Sisters, to the point where it's a wonder J.Lo continued to date me, much less marry me and have two kiddos! But I digress.



We went back to the House of Blues at some point, for my birthday I think, to see G.Love. And that was fantastic. As was the last concert I went to, which was Donovan Frankenreiter on Valentine's Day, 2005, at the Soapbox. The Soapbox is a pretty small venue, and the tickets were uber-cheap, so it was quite a fantastic, romantic date, heading downtown after a nice meal out to see one of Jack Johnson's pals.



Speaking of Jack Johnson, here are the concerts that I would see (will see, once I hit the jackpot) in a heartbeat:

Jack Johnson, preferably outdoors

Ben Folds

Death Cab for Cutie

The Shins

Cake

Paul Simon, with or without Garfunkel, I'm not picky

NKOTB, the reunion tour, without a shred of shame



I also wouldn't mind seeing:
Vampire Weekend
The Thrills

John Mayer

Matt Costa

Donovan Frankenreiter, again

Brett Dennen

David Gray

Billy Joel

Sarah Harmer
Sarah McLachlin

Natalie Merchant

Norah Jones, again

Alison Krauss

Flight of the Conchords



Hell, I'd even see Barry Manilow at this point. Or John Denver, if he hadn't left on a jet plane. And The Beatles, of course, if I had been born much earlier.



Those would be super-fun, if I had the money and/or was willing to spend it. And if I weren't such a crowd-phobe. And a loudness-phobe. And if I didn't get annoyed about little things like being too short to see over the Tall People.



Seriously guys, I'm so lame. A prioties overhaul might be in order. I must get back to the Jukebox!