shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Friday, May 16, 2008

The Bald, the British, the Beautiful

Weekly Special: Who are my top five 'freebie' hook ups?

You will never find me at a male strip club, fawning over some greased-up beefcake waving his Speedo-clad junk in my face. It's just not going to happen, I'm not that kind of girl. But you very well might catch me drooling over the following Cocktail Selection:


1. Jim from The Office. Who did you think I was going to pick, Creed? I just love Jim, want to marry him. Although as J.Lo recently pointed out, given certain trends in Jim and Pam's relationship, i.e. Jim knowing a week after they started dating that they'd eventually get married, Pam not agreeing to move in together until she has a ring on her finger, and the fun, light, teasing vibe they have between them? I kind of did marry Jim. Aw, was that too sappy? How about...

2. Jude Law, but ONLY in The Holiday. It's the only movie I can get past the nanny/womanizer thing. His character is quiet, charming, British, and oh yes, SMOKING HOT. Not only that, but he's super-cute with his little daughters. Mr. Napkin Face, anyone? Okay, I really do have to stop with this family-oriented crap, it's totally cutting into my full-fledged Dirty Smartini-ness. Moving on...

3. Noted Fashion Photographer, Nigel Barker! Absolutely must be said in a British accent. ASIDE from this completely sexy-sweet photo of Nigel Barker and his baby, pretty much all photos of the former model are completely hot. Except maybe when he has a full head of hair, which I totally don't get. Anyway, he's charming, a super-talented photographer, and he makes me laugh every ANTM panel with his unexpected snark. Also...

4. Go ahead, make fun of me, but: Chef Tom Colicchio. I admit, it was hard to find a decent photo of the Top Chef panel member. He's not particularly photogenic, strangely enough, but on TV, with those searing cool blue eyes? I didn't like him a bit the first season or two of Top Chef, mainly because he's such a hard-ass, but eventually he loosened up a bit, smiles a lot more now, making those blue eyes twinkle. And anyway, the chef hopefuls usually deserve what TC dishes out on TC. Let's just say I'd eat up Chef Colicchio's cooking any day. And finally...

5. Milo Ventimiglia. Or, as I think of him: Jess. He's Rory's Jess from Gilmore Girls, whether he's playing Rocky Balboa's son or Peter Petrelli on Heroes. I heart Jess and his brooding badass-ness, and those dark eyes, and that voice. He was totally wrong for Rory... well maybe just a little wrong for Rory. They could have worked it out. Why couldn't they have worked out? Anyway, Jess is sometimes the only thing keeping me hooked onto Heroes, as my mind tangents away from saving the world and dwells on other, much more interesting things, namely Jess's biceps.

Ladies, it was hard work serving up this Weekly Special on a Friday, after so many choice Cocktails were already taken! I do want to mention my own Sloppy Seconds, the ones that might have made my Final Five, had I taken an earlier shift: McDreamy (obviously), Christian Bale, Mr. Big, and Dr. Christian Troy. Ah, some other time, perhaps.

3 tips left at the bar:

Anonymous said...

This is still a GREAT list - which I'm very impressed by given your time slot.
J.Lo is your Jim! (too sweet - I almost made some notes in my list about how Hubby had the nice full lips and beautiful smile I kept touting and I had a picture of him that looked strikingly like the one I used of Jason Dohring, which was surprising for me)

Jude Law, definitely a cutie that's nice to watch on the big screen, but with a sordid reality that can be difficult to get over.
Nigel, ooh baby and of course Peter Petrelli! Excellent.

jenn said...

I was thinking of what my own list would be and I also had Jude Law, but also only in "The Holiday." I've never really had a thing for him, and certainly he is an ass in real life, but he is SO hot and lovable in that movie and every time I watch it I daydream about being Cameron Diaz.

ashley said...

Oooh, noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker. He is dreamy! I mean, on top of being a formal model, he does actually seem to have a brain, and is a Brit to boot. Good choice.