shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Monday, June 8, 2009

Forgive me, for I have...

... the messiest desk with the most insane assortment of stuff on it.

(This picture was taken one night when I had my online class but had to keep one eye on the kids since my husband was at work.)

Legend:

1. Husband's saddle in the corner
2. Diaper and wipes, just in case
3. Snack!
4. The only thing related to class on the whole desk
5. Bottle of weedeater oil I found my 18 month old trying to put in her mouth
6. Bottle of Kids Pepto that I had to open and dispense to my oldest
7. Two beers that are decidedly EMPTY
8. Class that I'm supposed to be paying attention to
9. Webcam that isn't plugged in but I would swear is still watching me
10. Baggie of misc. stuff from the move - 6 months ago
11. String cheese wrappers (snack for girls)
(not numbered, but there nonetheless: two phones (one plugged in, one not), a flashlight, a Tractor Supply mouse pad, big pile of papers yet to be filed)

As if that wasn't bad enough, I'm going to go ahead and admit that I...

... have an irrational fear of cockroaches. I don't like the little ones, but those big boys will send me into fits of hysteria. AND I MEAN IT. I somehow think they are going to run over and crawl up my leg or, if they are already dead, that they will come to life and crawl up my arm when I pick them up.

... have the longest, skinniest toes in the history of humans or apes.

... am in love with our new design, which wouldn't be so bad except that I'm the one who did it.

... (may or may not) go to the tanning bed.

Feeling better already,
(and no yelling about the TB),
Rubes

4 tips left at the bar:

sheila said...

Ruby, I have the same irrational fear of cockroaches! I mean, I will scream holy, bloody, crazy murder if I see one in the house - dead or alive. And because they fly, I always feel like they will fly right into my hair. YUCK!!!!

I think I woke a neighbor once when I lived in an apartment who thought I was being attacked. And I was - by a roach invading my home (not by a man in a mask with a weapon, as I'm sure the neighbor thought).

ICK...now I feel the need to go wash my hair.

Ruby said...

Sheila, I hadn't even thought about them flying!! Damn you! I hope that you are happy, contributing to my neuroses! :)

For the past few weeks we have had an errant cricket or spider in our rental house, but the day I saw one of those big boogers, I called the exterminator - STAT. (I had just gotten out of the shower and was standing there, in my towel, doing the whisper scream since the girls were still asleep!) Apparently they could tell that I meant business because they came out that same day! Whew!

niki said...

That is SO not the messiest desk; where I come from that shit is Org-O-Nized. Anywhoo, the numbered guide is freakin' awesome and we need to have more of those type pictures. Just uh, not of my desk.

Choosing to pretend comments re: cockroaches flying into one's hair have not been made so that I can sleep tonight because....EEW.

penelope said...

Just last night I had one of those damn cockroaches under my desk. Horrors! When I first moved to the South, one ran over my FACE while I was sleeping. I shit you not. I am forever scarred.

Um, you know I've got to say something: isn't the sun free where you live?

:)