shot of sass, served on (n)ice

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

My Obsession, My Drug

Damn you Pink is the New Blog for starting all this.

It was the summer of 2005.  I was a law clerk with about 7 other law students at the local legal aid center.  Because we weren't working cushy firm jobs we didn't have offices, fancy free lunches, or evening cruises and booze-a-thons. No.  We had the Boiler Room, a giant conference table for all of us, and internet access.

That's when Erin shared the new latest internet craze: PITNB.  Oh my goodness how it got me through those summer days and fueled many an important Boiler Room discussion (in addition to who had the stupidest client)! 

It was downhill after that.  Perez Hilton, Go Fug Yourself, the Superficial, Hollywood Tuna.  You name it, I've probably heard of it and more than likely have visited it a time or two.  Many a morning has been wasted both in law school and at work avoiding actual productivity in favor of consuming this garbage.

The problem is that I am well aware how terrible and shady the entire thing is.  Paparazzi make me sick to my stomach with their stalking and screaming; I loathe their very existence.  In support of this stance, I have never bought a sleazy tabloid in my life (save the occasional People magazine, but never Star!, OK!, or even US Weekly).

Yet every day, there I am, insatiably perusing the internets for the latest info.  This year I almost resolved to cut it out. . .it's just that I know that I can't. If I don't have this, then all I have is alcohol, food, and sex and since I'm in a long-distance relationship, I need the celebrity gossip, people.

So, I have my standards.  Dlisted by far has the most hilarious and witty commentary, but sometimes I don't even have enough attention to read it.  PITNB was my first, so I can't give it up even though the pink text on black background kills me to read. Ugh. Hate that.  Mainly I just scroll for pictures and headlines. Trent also does a good job of covering the widest variety of celebs. Perez is my drug of choice, even though I think he's a douchebag and only "reports" one side of a story.  And TMZ? Only if I'm truly, truly desperate for procrastination. Something about it just reeks of sleaze and I just can't go there.

On the plus side, I can have very intelligent conversations with 13-year-old girls about the Jonai, Miley, Taylor, et al as well as dish on the latest Oscar contenders with my more adult friends.  Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to see what crazy fight Lindsay and Samantha got into last night. Those two. I really hope they can keep it together ; )

2 tips left at the bar:

Megan said...

I do not think you are alone in this, my friend! I got hooked on PITNB (thanks to you!) for a summer too. Then Trent started putting up a ton of ads and posting multiple times during the day (presumably to get more hits?) and I fell out of habit.

Dlisted is terribly delicious!

penelope said...

At least this habit is smile-worthy, however, unlike reading the "real" news. That just makes a person surly, I can attest. I need to get on board with the PITNB. I do enjoy Project Rungay, but it's not as great when that actual show isn't on for them to shred...